Nearly two-and-a-half years into this parenting expedition,
with my youngest turning 1 year old in a week, today was the day I decided to
be a mother.
As the babies become
children, I’ve realised that a more specific, thoughtful approach must be
used. My former technique of priding myself on chaos,
unpredictability, heedless spending (“they’re only babies once! Let’s go get
pizza! I deserve this cab!), and an attempt at an adult social life is no longer the theme of the day. This weekend I’ve taken steps towards a
working budget, spent only £3 in unnecessary costs (at the nearby coffee shop),
tested children’s recipes using the book I nearly gave away a few months ago, texted
and phoned a favourite babysitter simply because I was concerned about her well
being, planned Jasper's birthday party for next weekend, and declined an offer to go out to a fancy restaurant in the evening with
good friends. And the events of this
morning may have spurred this all on.
This morning, I awoke to the creaking of my bedroom
door. As he has only recently gone into
his own bed, it still took me a second to realise the little presence was
James, aged 2.5. He seemed to look at
me and decide I was sleeping (I lay as still as possible, hesitating even to breathe). A patter of departing feet. Seconds later, I hear a squawk from the 11-month old as he awakes, and
following his normal routine, starts to cry, as if protesting his very existence.
But this morning is different - James has it under control. Magically, through unknown means, he soon sends the little one into spasms
of giggles. Finally, I force myself out
of bed (I’ve now forgotten whether it’s possible to start a day in a way other
than “reluctantly,” no matter how sweet my boys are) and go into the room. I find James completely naked, having cast
aside his pull-up and sat on the potty to go wee wee. Never mind that there was a poo in the pull up
that has now been discarded on the floor.
It’s still a massive step in the evolution from baby to boy – he has
deliberately surmounted obstacles in order to use the potty.
And, amazingly, he seems to have tried to spare me a few extra minutes of shut-eye. This little toddler seems to be solidly in my corner. He's becoming my friend.
