I've often wondered what exactly it is about parenting that attracts people. For some, it's the chance to unselfishly love another. Others - gardeners, if you will - enjoy watching the baby grow. A few procreate because it is expected. There are always the accidental parents.
But I've been exposed recently to parents who fall into a more insidious category: the Manic Life Sculpter.
We are all life sculpters to a degree. We need to make choices about our children - where they will live, where they travel, who they stay with, what they eat, what they call their grandparents. But some parents take this too far.
In many cities, there are private schools. Some of these private schools are difficult to get into, and require elaborate testing. Others are difficult to get into because of lottery systems that are used. One of these with the highest reputation uses a system whereby they take the first two students born in each month. This system was created because of its randomness.
We learned that an acquaintence of ours scheduled an elective c-section to be on the first of the month so that their little girl is assured a place. The c-section went as planned, and the little girl was awarded a place. It brings success-obsession to a whole new level - if the parents are exerting this much pressure on her even before she was born, what type of childhood can she expect?
One distant from her parents, it seems. The parents have already lost interest, it seems, in their child, and began using babysitters and nannies when the child was only 2 days old. It was not for a major event - a wedding that was unmissable, or a return to work. No, the parents did this solely so that they could have a regular meal at the local restaurant.
I try to refrain from judging the actions of parents, and I know that we all approach it with different motivations and expected outcomes. But this striving for "success" while ignoring true acts of successful parenting is in an entirely different category.
No comments:
Post a Comment